February 20: The mall in Japantown had a store that featured a complete makeup set designed to look like cows. The little tubs of lotions balanced on four legs, only letting you reach the ointment after you twisted off the beast’s head and torso. The white contouring sticks were splattered with a black puddle pattern.
February 21: There was a strip of black duct tape was plastered across the pull handle of the fire alarm, but it still wasn’t enough to prevent it from getting pulled again this week. I think that’s the 5th false alarm since I started working here.
February 22: The lights went out in the cafeteria while Mr. Carlson’s class was still winding their way through the audience to get to the stage for their performance. They all stepped dead in their tracks until a few parents and I turned on the flashlights on our phones and shined them at the ground, creating a little stepping stone path of lights.
February 23: There is a health safety sign in the College Connect office that pictures a man doing the dab and text underneath reminding us that this position is the Defense Against Bacteria.
February 24: We had a program-wide kickball game for Manny's last day. His girls kept running from team to team, trying to convince everyone that they had caught him crying.
February 25: It took some effort to convince Nick not to set an alarm when we took a nap. You have to walk on the wild side sometimes.
February 26: Nick’s parents asked us to reschedule our wedding because they were planning a month-long trip to Thailand around that time. They haven’t bought tickets yet or even planned out where they are going, but they wanted us to switch weekends because it was more convenient for them.
much love,
hedgie
Sunday, February 26, 2017
Sunday, February 19, 2017
run with the bulls
February 13: I want to punch whoever taught the students how to play dodgeball. Over the last few weeks, I haven’t been able to get through a whole morning recess shift without someone bleeding or having to break up a fist fight.
February 14: Nick got a stomach bug halfway through Valentine’s Day. On one hand, I felt bad that he clearly wasn’t feeling well. But on the other hand, I got to eat our chocolate soufflé by myself.
February 15: The plague is upon us again. Melissa and Manny called in sick today and both Fernando and Isabel are on the verge of following suit.
February 16: The first graders were released from the bus on their return from their field trip where they watched Aladdin preformed entirely by a cast of elderly white women. A wild stream of them ran screaming by as I stepped out of the bungalow to get a drink of water. I now have a vague idea of how the people who run with the bulls feel.
February 17: Luis warned us over the foil-wrapped and on fire sushi roll that if we ever made it out to Thailand that we should never touch a child on the head. We are all still trying to figure out why he felt we needed to be taught to not touch children we don’t know.
February 18: I started playing Words With Friends again. Elaine just played the word “dildo” against me for 20 points.
February 19: A secret I had mailed to PostSecret almost a decade ago showed up on the website again. I can still remember making it at the desk of my dorm room in North Morlan, but I don’t feel connected to it, like I had watched it happen on a movie screen instead of been a part of it.
much love,
hedgie
February 14: Nick got a stomach bug halfway through Valentine’s Day. On one hand, I felt bad that he clearly wasn’t feeling well. But on the other hand, I got to eat our chocolate soufflé by myself.
February 15: The plague is upon us again. Melissa and Manny called in sick today and both Fernando and Isabel are on the verge of following suit.
February 16: The first graders were released from the bus on their return from their field trip where they watched Aladdin preformed entirely by a cast of elderly white women. A wild stream of them ran screaming by as I stepped out of the bungalow to get a drink of water. I now have a vague idea of how the people who run with the bulls feel.
February 17: Luis warned us over the foil-wrapped and on fire sushi roll that if we ever made it out to Thailand that we should never touch a child on the head. We are all still trying to figure out why he felt we needed to be taught to not touch children we don’t know.
February 18: I started playing Words With Friends again. Elaine just played the word “dildo” against me for 20 points.
February 19: A secret I had mailed to PostSecret almost a decade ago showed up on the website again. I can still remember making it at the desk of my dorm room in North Morlan, but I don’t feel connected to it, like I had watched it happen on a movie screen instead of been a part of it.
much love,
hedgie
Sunday, February 12, 2017
buses only
February 6: Abel only brings his backpack to school around once every two weeks, and on those days, he usually leaves it in the classroom and only remembers it after the school has already been locked up. Today was the only day for the last three weeks that he brought his backpack. It smelled so rank that I had to push it out in the hallway to stop the rest of my students from gagging.
February 7: We FaceTimed Uncle Steve so that my detective class could have the chance to talk to a real detective and hear what a day in the life of one was like.
Celeste was the first to raise her hand. “Are you old?”
February 8: Shanah had me wait outside of the bungalow so that I could walk with her and her family. “Miss Skye said she would get me a chocker necklace for Valentine’s Day,” she said as we waited for the light on the street corner we separated at. “I hope she does so that I can be more like her.” She gave me a side glance before heading towards home. “No offense, Miss Heather.”
February 9: I found a “No Parking, Buses Only” sign jammed into the plastic cover of the fluorescent ceiling light that was at least 10 feet above my head. I made all of my students pinkie promise that they would not park a car upside-down on the ceiling. Three of them refused to make such a promise.
February 10: Nancy keeps calling me aside to make guesses as to what George is up to right now. They usually involve him jumping up and down on the bed or breaking into the fridge to eat all of the carrots. Today, she suggested that Addie and George were having a food fight by way of magic.
February 11: A woman pushed her toddler in a stroller past us and there was a bottle of champagne and a plastic jug of orange juice stashed in the under storage compartment. I aspire to be that kind of mother some day.
February 12: Luli and I kept getting distracted during our talk about how our wedding planning journeys were going because a man decided to show his children how a push mower worked without teaching them to not stick their tiny arms through the twisted blades to pick up pieces of shorn grass.
much love,
hedgie
February 7: We FaceTimed Uncle Steve so that my detective class could have the chance to talk to a real detective and hear what a day in the life of one was like.
Celeste was the first to raise her hand. “Are you old?”
February 8: Shanah had me wait outside of the bungalow so that I could walk with her and her family. “Miss Skye said she would get me a chocker necklace for Valentine’s Day,” she said as we waited for the light on the street corner we separated at. “I hope she does so that I can be more like her.” She gave me a side glance before heading towards home. “No offense, Miss Heather.”
February 9: I found a “No Parking, Buses Only” sign jammed into the plastic cover of the fluorescent ceiling light that was at least 10 feet above my head. I made all of my students pinkie promise that they would not park a car upside-down on the ceiling. Three of them refused to make such a promise.
February 10: Nancy keeps calling me aside to make guesses as to what George is up to right now. They usually involve him jumping up and down on the bed or breaking into the fridge to eat all of the carrots. Today, she suggested that Addie and George were having a food fight by way of magic.
February 11: A woman pushed her toddler in a stroller past us and there was a bottle of champagne and a plastic jug of orange juice stashed in the under storage compartment. I aspire to be that kind of mother some day.
February 12: Luli and I kept getting distracted during our talk about how our wedding planning journeys were going because a man decided to show his children how a push mower worked without teaching them to not stick their tiny arms through the twisted blades to pick up pieces of shorn grass.
much love,
hedgie
Sunday, February 5, 2017
acupuncture needles
February 1: An hour after she came into the office, Jen asked me if I could check her shoulder blade for an acupuncture needle. She suspected one was left in from her appointment this morning because it was not the first time this place had left needles pinned into her back. I found the needle, bent over from her shirt, the outer end spiraled in order to make it more noticeable and avoid the situation she found herself in twice now.
February 2: Arianna had a homework assignment that required her to write three opinions about the requirements a person needs to meet in order to run for president. Her first issue was with the age minimum. She believes that younger people should be allowed for consideration. “How old are you?” she asked me, halfway through writing her sentence.
I picked a Fruit Roll-Up wrapper off the floor. “27.”
“I think the age should be 27,” she said.
February 3: After my lesson on different foods that are good and bad for the brain, Miss Skye has told me that everyday, at least six of her students come up to her one at a time to let her know that her Diet Coke is rotting her mind.
February 4: Nick and I both ordered large milk teas at FrosTea, but nothing prepared us for the beach pail-sized drinks we were handed three minutes later.
February 5: I’m still congested two weeks later. Even my ears feel stuffed up and it’s affecting my sense of balance. I wish there was a way to deflate my own head.
much love,
hedgie
February 2: Arianna had a homework assignment that required her to write three opinions about the requirements a person needs to meet in order to run for president. Her first issue was with the age minimum. She believes that younger people should be allowed for consideration. “How old are you?” she asked me, halfway through writing her sentence.
I picked a Fruit Roll-Up wrapper off the floor. “27.”
“I think the age should be 27,” she said.
February 3: After my lesson on different foods that are good and bad for the brain, Miss Skye has told me that everyday, at least six of her students come up to her one at a time to let her know that her Diet Coke is rotting her mind.
February 4: Nick and I both ordered large milk teas at FrosTea, but nothing prepared us for the beach pail-sized drinks we were handed three minutes later.
February 5: I’m still congested two weeks later. Even my ears feel stuffed up and it’s affecting my sense of balance. I wish there was a way to deflate my own head.
much love,
hedgie
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