she said, “I just ate the skull” and then giggled

December 1: Miss Connie brought in balut to work and ate it while standing over the trashcan. All of our coworkers were horrified, especially when she said, “I just ate the skull” and then giggled.

December 2: There was a sushi restaurant on the corner that advertised their “All You Can It Sushi”. The sign went uncorrected for years, which my brothers loved. I wasn’t much of a fan of actually eating there. They shared a wall with an exotic bird store, so the restaurant always smelled like birds and seed.

December 3: My new laptop arrived! It’s so beautiful and doesn’t take fifteen minutes to load a three minute long video!

December 4: One of our neighbors has now taped a sign on his trashcan saying that he has installed a camera inside of it and would post photos of anyone who threw dog poop away in it on social media. I can’t decide if this guy is just really weird about his trashcan or if it’s a genius ploy to get angry people to actually clean up after their dogs.

December 5: Rah has been working on his own version of “Diary of a Wimpy Kid” and has been gathering quotes from all the teachers to write on the back. 
“This looks awesome!”—Miss Heather
“Where am I on there?”—Miss Ana

December 6: Kiara started in my class today. She has made quite the impression on all the other staff members as she began a wrestling match at the beginning to class and was picked up half an hour after we close.

December 7: Shanah cried at least a dozen times today. What surprises me most is that she didn’t collapse from dehydration at any point.

December 8: Dora wants to leave the soccer team because the boys won’t stop making ball sack jokes.

December 9: The Google Christmas party employed two women who did nothing but swing back and forth on long poles. They wore long, white dresses that covered the poles so that they looked like they were fifteen feet tall. When they climbed down from on the poles to go on break, they pulled up the long fabric draping down to reveal that they were both wearing leggings and converse underneath.




much love,
hedgie